3.3 Susan's Story
People need to be educated about these issues instead of punishing you for it, and making you feel even worse. Because you're already feeling horrible, this man's making you feel horrible and stupid. And then you come out to try and get help and people are making you feel even stupider. And you go to your doctor and he yells at you for going back. I know he meant well, but you just feel even stupider.
I think they were really judgmental, and I think that's sad because if they really got to know half the women out there, they're not stupid. It could happen to anybody. Just because one is a caregiving type of person and likes to try and help somebody, doesn't mean they are stupid. It's just unfortunate that they end up with the wrong man who abuses them and takes advantage of it. I was not raised in an abusive environment, where I actually saw violence, so I didn't understand how I got involved in that relationship. But I do now, because I was trying to help. And I thought I could make things better. And I still want to be known as the kind of person who tries to help, who tries to make things better. I think they could be a little more understanding of who the person is. If people had wanted to help, they could have been more asking me 'What can I do to help you?' At that time I don't know what they could have done, but just knowing that somebody cared enough to ask would have been really important.
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Health-Care Experiences
Clearly, health-care providers attempted to address the issue of the abuse in Susan's relationship, and potentially her use of substances. What were some of the ways that health-care providers made Susan feel, albeit unintentionally, that echoed how she was made to feel in the rest of her life?
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What does Susan tell us would have been helpful?
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What in your training or workplace might make it difficult to provide more helpful care?
The 'best practices' module (module 5) will explore in greater detail what nurses and allied health-care providers can do to provide supportive and helpful health-care experiences for women in similar situations to Susan.
Return now to Susan's story to hear about her experiences with drug treatment.