3.3 Susan's Story
It was sort of an off-on relationship for 16 years. There was no abuse in my family history, my father never beat my mother, so in the beginning when it first started, I did believe that there was something wrong that I had done. And then, of course, there was the vicious circle where he would say it would never happen again, so I'd take him back and the honeymoon would wear off a month later or a few weeks later. It just got shorter and shorter, right?
The first time he hit me, I'll never forget. It was shortly after our son was born. I was shocked. I didn't expect it. But if I really think about it, I should have saw this coming a long time before because there was a lot of control in how he stopped me from seeing my friends by being really rude to them and a lot of my friends didn't come around because they didn't like the way he was treating me. I'm a caregiver, I enjoy looking after my man. I would give, give, give, do, do, do and it got to the point where it was expected, and the appreciation wasn't there, where nothing was done right and then the beatings came on. It was just endless.
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You may be wondering why this seems to be another story of an abusive relationship. For many women, the story of substance use is first and foremost a story of abuse. According to Dr. Norma Finkelstein, a well-respected researcher in women's health, 'trauma is central and pervasive to the development of addiction and mental health problems in women'(Finkelstein, 2004). Take the following quiz to see the extent to which woman abuse, substance use and mental health issues can overlap in women's lives.
Click to complete the "Links between High Risk Issues" Quiz
To do the quiz, click on what you believe to be the correct answer (which are indicated between the '|'). If you are right, a checkmark will appear momentarily on the screen. If this does not happen, guess again.
Return to Susan's story now to see how these links played out in her life.